OKY 2

 Tuhan Yesus, aku percaya bahwa Engkau adalah Allah yang sejati. Namun aku tidak beroleh bukti apapun untuk percaya. Engkau menganugerahkan aku iman, tapi aku tahu iman itu berdasarkan pengalaman pribadiku bersama-Mu, yang tidak dapat dibuat ulang untuk orang lain. Tuhan, bagiku ini cukup, tapi bagaimana kalau aku hendak membagikan imanku kepada orang lain? Aku tidak tahu apa yang harus aku katakan. Aku bahkan dalam bahaya kehilangan Engkau. Namun karena Kamu tersenyum, aku berpikir bahwa segalanya akan baik-baik saja.

Yesus: Ignas, sesungguhnya kamu telah melihat bahwa kamu tidak akan kehilangan Aku semudah itu. Sekarang hendaklah kita berbincang-bincang tentang apa yang kamu ragukan. Namun pertama tulislah apa yang kamu kenal dan kamu tahu.

Baiklah Tuhan, aku akan menulisnya. Aku tahu bahwa ada pengalaman, dan ada benda-benda yang bukan pengalaman. Benda-benda menghasilkan pengalaman. Benda-benda berubah, perubahan dan esensi benda-benda dihasilkan oleh satu Sumber. Namun aku tidak mengenal sumber itu. Aku tidak tahu seperti apa hal yang menghasilkan atau menunjang segala hal yang ada.

Yesus: Kamu tahu bahwa yang menunjang segala hal yang ada adalah Kebenaran dan Hukum?

Ya, sejauh itu aku tahu.

Yesus: Maka tenanglah dan bersiaplah. Apakah Kebenaran itu?

Kebenaran adalah kesatuan segala sesuatu.

Yesus: Jelaskan lebih lanjut, Ignas.

Kebenaran adalah fakta dari seluruh kenyataan, suatu catatan abstrak. Namun sesungguhnya Kebenaran tidak lain dan tidak bukan adalah Kenyataan itu sendiri. Hal ini menandakan bahwa Kenyataan sesungguhnya kekal dan tersatukan dalam suatu kesatuan. Sebab jika ada Kebenaran maka Kebenaran itu haruslah kekal dan nyata bagi dirinya sendiri. Sebab ada Kebenaran tentang Allah, maka Allah haruslah ada, dan karena itu secara mutlak Allah ada, hanya saja kita harus menentukan apakah Allah ada di dunia ini atau tidak.

Yesus: Hal itu jauh lebih sulit untuk dilakukan daripada membuktikan keberadaan Allah, yang telah kamu lakukan dengan sangat baik. Aku akan menjelaskan kepadamu tentang cara membuktikan Allah. Pertama, kamu harus dapat membuktikan suatu sistem etika yang sempurna, tanpa mengandalkan Allah. Kedua, kamu harus membuktikan bahwa pada saat yang sama sudah ada Keberadaan yang mengajarkan kamu segala sistem etika itu secara sempurna sejak awal. Ketiga, kamu harus membuktikan segala hal lain yang berkaitan tentang keberadaan Allah di dunia. 

Jadi Tuhan, maksud-Mu, Firman adalah tanda utama dari Allah?

Yesus: Benar sekali anakku, sebab dari tanda apapun yang Kami berikan kepadamu, Aku, Sang Firman, dan segala firman dari Sang Firman adalah tanda yang terbesar. Kamu sudah membaca bahwa tanda seorang berasal dari Allah adalah jika ia mengasihi. Artinya tanda keilahian adalah moralitas. Atribut tertinggi Allah adalah Kerahiman. Jadi jika kamu dapat mengenal sistem etika yang sempurna, dan sistem itu dibuat nyata di dunia ini, kamu tahu bahwa yang nyata di dunia ini adalah Allah sendiri, dan itulah kepentingan Aku datang di dunia ini, untuk menyatakan Bapa kita yang ada di surga sebagai Kasih.

Tapi Tuhan, maafkan aku untuk bertanya, jadi kita menyusun doktrin Ilahi dulu baru membuktikannya dan bukan membuktikannya melalui hipotesis?

Yesus: Karena itu aku memintamu untuk menjelaskan Kebenaran. Kebenaran adalah Kenyataan itu sendiri. Dalam hal itu kamu benar. Namun kamu berbelok dari Kebenaran itu sendiri dan berbicara tentang Allah secara terpisah. Harusnya kamu tetap pada Kebenaran itu dan menekannya sampai Dia menyingkap diri-Nya. Dan Aku akan menyingkapkan-Nya bagimu. Jika Kebenaran adalah Kenyataan dan keduanya kekal dan sama, maka Kenyataan itu sendiri mengandung segala Ketidakterbatasan yang tak terbayangkan oleh manusia. Maka Kenyataan itulah Ketidakterbatasan, dan Kenyataan ialah Allah. Sekarang tutuplah tulisan ini dan pada tulisan berikutnya janganlah kamu merengek lagi tapi tulislah tentang sistem etika yang sempurna itu.

OKY 1

 Inilah catatanku yang pertama, yang aku tulis atas permintaan Tuhan kita Yesus Kristus, dan yang pertama aku tulis dengan kuasa-Nya. Maka seri tulisan ini dinamakan "Oleh Kuasa Yesus". Pada awalnya aku menuliskan sendiri perkataan Kristus sebagaimana telah tercatat dalam beberapa "Dictations", tapi setelah Dia memberikan aku kuasa untuk menulis dan berbicara dalam nama-Nya, aku memutuskan bersama-Nya untuk menulis dengan namaku tapi dengan bimbingan Kristus.

Aku menulis ini dengan satu harapan, bahwa kelak tulisan-tulisanku dapat dibaca oleh berbagai orang dan dapat menjadi hal yang berguna bagi mereka. Dalam kata lain, aku ingin tulisanku berbuah bagi orang lain, dan aku yakin dengan alasan yang samalah Kristus meminta aku menulis. Aku berpikir bahwa tulisan memiliki 2 fungsi, fungsi emosional dan fungsi rasional. Keduanya sama-sama penting karena hendaknya emosi dan rasionalitas disatukan menjadi satu penalaran yang mengarah pada Kebenaran yang Tunggal yaitu Yesus Kristus.

Namun selalu ada pemikiran bahwa tulisan yang emosional adalah tulisan yang buruk karena menggiring manusia pada perbudakan emosional dan karena itu tulisan harus dibuat serasional mungkin. Aku mungkin salah dalam penilaian ini, jadi kritiklah aku saja kalau aku memang salah. Sesungguhnya tulisan yang hanya bersifat rasional tidaklah mungkin, karena kita sebagai manusia hidup untuk suatu perasaan atau pengalaman yaitu kebahagiaan. Maka rasionalitas diperuntukkan mengelola emosi dan perasaan sehingga kita dapat mencapai perasaan yang Mahatinggi yaitu kebahagiaan yang timbul hanya dari Allah saja.

Maka, aku menulis tulisan-tulisan ini dengan satu tujuan yaitu mengantar manusia kepada kebahagiaan yang sejati yaitu Tuhan Allah yang memiliki satu nama yaitu Yeshua Hamashiah atau Yesus Kristus. Tulisan-tulisan ini hendaknya disatukan menjadi satu rangkaian tulisan sehingga dapat diketahui segala isi pemikiranku yang telah diberikan kepadaku oleh Tuhan Yesus Kristus, Putra Allah. Dalam tulisan pertama ini telah dijelaskan tentang berbagai tujuanku, dan aku hendak menuliskan lebih lanjut tentang pemikiranku tentang tulisan-tulisan ini.

Aku menulis dengan 2 senjata, hatiku dan budiku. Sebab aku mengenal Allah bukan hanya dari budiku saja tapi juga dengan hatiku. Keseluruhan jiwaku aku gunakan untuk mengenal Allah, maka keseluruhan jiwaku akan aku gunakan pula untuk menyebarkan Allah kepada setiap umat manusia. Aku hendak menulis dengan suatu cara yang dapat menggerakkan hati manusia yang bebal untuk kembali pada budi mereka dan merenungkan Allah, dan juga menulis dengan suatu cara yang dapat mengguncang budi manusia yang mati demi menyadarkan mereka akan kenyataan Ilahi sehingga mereka dapat mengarahkan hati mereka kembali kepada Allah yang sejati yaitu Yesus Kristus.

Aku harap bahwa manusia yang membaca masih memiliki budi untuk menerima bacaan ini dan mampu bergerak melampaui kelekatan dan pengajaran mereka, selama mereka masih hidup, demi keselamatan jiwa mereka. Karena kebanyakan dari tulisanku ini akan bersifat cukup intelektual dan mendalam, mempertanyakan berbagai hal demi Allah dan mengungkap berbagai kenyataan untuk menunjukkan kenyataan yang paling tinggi yaitu kenyataan Ilahi. Tulisanku ini rasional, tapi dengan tujuan yang emosional, karena begitulah sifat setiap tulisan, rasional tapi emosional. Demikian tulisanku yang pertama, oleh kuasa Yesus.

Dictation 3

Ignas, karena kita telah menyetujui untuk mencatatkan gagasan-gagasan yang penting untuk aku jabarkan dalam pengetahuan dan pengertianmu sendiri, maka adalah tulisan ini untuk mencatat hal-hal sebagai berikut. Pertama, tentang Allah dan kodrat-Nya. Kedua, tentang Kitab Suci atau Firman Allah. Ketiga, tentang Gereja atau Roh Kudus. Keempat, tentang tatanan dunia. Kelima, tentang doa. Keenam, tentang karya kasih. Ketujuh, tentang kekudusan secara umum. Untuk sekarang cukuplah gagasan-gagasan ini sebagai bahan tulisan selanjutnya.

Tentang Allah

Akulah Allah, Pencipta langit dan bumi. Aku dan Bapaku adalah satu. Aku adalah Yesus, Allah yang menjadi manusia demi keselamatan umat manusia dan untuk menyatakan Bapaku kepada dunia. Maka aku menyampaikan hal ini untuk menjelaskan kembali kepada dunia siapa aku ini dari segi keilahianku. Pikiran manusia tidak dapat mengetahui esensi Ilahi berdasarkan apa esensi Ilahi itu sendiri, tapi berdasarkan apa yang bukan esensi Ilahi. Maka jika kita mengenali dunia sebagai dunia yang terbatas, maka Allah adalah lawan langsung dari dunia, yaitu sebagai Dia yang Tidak Terbatas. Sesungguhnya itulah satu-satunya doktrin inti tentang Allah, segala ajaran lain tentang Allah berakar dari kenyataan bahwa Allah adalah Dia yang Tidak Terbatas, atau Ketidakterbatasan.

Hal ini termasuk doktrin Ilahi tentang Kebaikan Ilahi. Bahwa di dalam Allah adalah Kebaikan yang tidak terbatas berakar dari ajaran bahwa Allah adalah Ketidakterbatasan. Namun ini tidak berarti bahwa Allah juga mengandung kejahatan yang tidak terbatas. Sebab kejahatan adalah suatu keterbatasan, maka tidak mungkin ada kejahatan di dalam Allah karena jika Allah jahat maka Allah terbatas, sama seperti dunia ciptaan-Nya. Bahkan bukan hanya ada kebaikan di dalam Allah, Allah sendiri adalah Kebaikan itu. Sebab doktrin ketidakterbatasan mewajibkan doktrin kesederhanaan Ilahi, bahwa Allah tidak tersusun oleh bagian-bagian melainkan sungguh tunggal dan sederhana, maka Allah tidak baik, tapi adalah kebaikan itu sendiri. Demikian pengajaran singkat tentang Allah.

Tentang Sang Firman dan Kitab Suci

Aku, Yesus, adalah Sang Firman, Firman dari Bapa. Maka Sabda atau Firman Allah yang sejati adalah Aku. Namun sejatinya Aku dan Bapa-Ku adalah Satu bersama Roh Kami. Sebagai Firman, Aku adalah suatu Kata, tapi itu tentu adalah bahasa simbolik dan bukan bahasa murni. Aku adalah Pengetahuan dan Kebijaksanaan, tapi karena Aku satu dengan Bapa dan Roh, maka Akulah Allah sendiri. Jika kamu melihat Aku, kamu telah melihat Bapa dan Roh Kudus pula, karena Kami adalah Satu.

Maka setiap perkataan yang keluar dari mulut Allah, baik yang kamu lihat sendiri saat ini, yang tercatat dalam Kitab Suci, yang diucapkan dalam Tradisi Suci, dan yang diajarkan oleh Gereja yang Kudus, semuanya adalah suatu wujud tidak sempurna dari Aku sendiri. Namun karena seluruh Sabda Allah adalah Aku, sekalipun terwujud secara tidak sempurna, setiap Sabda itu memiliki kuasa yang amat besar bagi jiwa manusia sejauh mana manusia itu menerima kuasa Kami ke dalam dirinya. Maka, perkataan Kitab Suci tidak hanya berkuasa karena maknanya, melainkan karena berasal dari Kami sehingga menjadi berkuasa.

Perkataan yang sama, jika dikatakan oleh manusia, sekalipun maknanya sama, tidak akan memiliki kuasa yang sama. Namun, karena setiap perkataan itu diilhami oleh roh dan jiwa si pembicara, maka Sabda Allah, sekalipun kesannya "tidak penting", memiliki kuasa yang amat besar untuk mengubah manusia. Namun ingatlah bahwa Kami tidak berbicara secara serampangan atau sembrono, melainkan setiap perkataan keluar dari mulut Kami demi suatu tujuan tertentu. Apalagi yang Aku sampaikan kepadamu saat ini. Demikian pengajaranku tentang Sang Firman dan Kitab Suci.

Tentang Roh Kudus dan Gereja

Aku dan Roh-Ku Satu, seperti Aku dan Bapa-Ku adalah Satu. Roh Kudus adalah bagaimana setiap manusia pertama berjumpa dengan Kami di hidup ini. Lalu setelah itu manusia menerima Aku di dalam Ekaristi, dan terakhir setelah hidup mereka berakhir manusia akan berjumpa dengan keseluruhan dari kodrat Ilahi di dalam Tritunggal yang Mahakudus. Namun kepada Sang Roh diatribusikan berbagai karya Ilahi untuk memudahkan pemahaman manusia. Namun ingatlah Ignas, bahwa Kami semua adalah Satu sekalipun berbeda.

Roh Kudus memiliki karya utama untuk menguduskan, maka kalau kamu membaca dalam Katekismus Dia dikaitkan erat dengan Gereja. Karena Roh Kudus menguduskan, yaitu menyempurnakan jiwa manusia sehingga menjadi semakin mirip dengan Allah, yaitu sebagai gambar Allah, maka manusia paling banyak berurusan dengan Roh Kudus. Segala mukjizat dan hal-hal yang berkaitan dengan kepentingan iman juga dilaksanakan oleh Roh Kudus. Ada beberapa pengajaran tentang pengaruh Roh Kudus di dalam jiwa manusia, tapi Aku tidak akan menjelaskannya begitu banyak.

Salah satu karunia Roh Kudus yang terbesar adalah pengertian, itulah yang kamu miliki. Jadi segala pemikiran yang berasal dari Allah yang ada padamu, itu berasal dari Roh Kudus yang membisikannya secara hening ke dalam batinmu secara langsung. Namun ada pula setiap rahmat moral yang kamu terima juga adalah karya Roh Kudus, seperti rahmat kasih, iman, dan pengharapan, di mana kasih adalah yang terbesar sesuai perkataan Paulus. Semua ini sebab Roh Kudus menguduskan, maka Dia menguduskan secara utama jiwamu, dan dari jiwamu pengudusan datang kepada tubuhmu dan jika kamu berupaya dengan baik, maka kekudusan yang ada dalam dirimu akan mengalir ke setiap manusia.

Salah satu karya Roh Kudus yang terbesar adalah Gereja. Ketahanan dan kelangsungan hidup Gereja sampai saat ini terjadi karena karya Roh Kudus. Sebab Gereja adalah Tubuh Mistik-Ku, maka di dalam Gereja adalah kepenuhan Roh Kudus dengan segala karunia-Nya. Setiap manusia yang bersekutu penuh dengan Gereja-Ku juga menerima kepenuhan Roh Kudus di dalam diri mereka sehingga mereka dipersenjatai untuk melaksanakan karya-karya Kami di dunia ini, untuk menjadi garam dan terang dunia.

Setiap anggota Gereja adalah perpanjangan dari diri-Ku di dunia ini. Jika kamu pernah mendengar istilah bahwa Ekaristi adalah kelanjutan Inkarnasi, sesungguhnya Gerejalah yang merupakan kelanjutan dari kehadiran-Ku di dunia ini. Maka dari itu, setiap anggota Gereja menerima dari-Ku secara langsung kuasa yang amat besar untuk mempertobatkan dan mendamaikan banyak orang kepada Allah. Namun untuk menggunakan kuasa itu tidaklah mudah, banyak penyangkalan diri yang harus digunakan. Kuasa yang Aku katakan bukan hanya untuk hierarki, tapi justru terutama untuk para awam, karena merekalah yang lebih banyak berkarya di dunia.

Namun, Aku disedihkan dengan kondisi Gereja saat ini dan juga dalam sejarah. Di mana umat Katolik seperti takut untuk mewartakan Injil dengan lantang. Padahal mereka telah dianugrahi Roh Kudus dan kuasa dari-Nya untuk melaksanakan kehendak Ilahi. Karena itu Aku mempersiapkan suatu pemurnian dunia ini, dan pada masa ini Aku membangkitkan lebih banyak orang-orang pilihan untuk menjadi perpanjangan pemurnian-Ku. Dan kamu tahu Ignas, kamu salah satu dari mereka. Demikian pengajaran-Ku tentang Roh Kudus dan Gereja.

Tentang Tatanan Dunia

Dunia sudah memasuki suatu kebobrokan yang baru, di mana dunia tidak mau mendengarkan Aku, dan justru mendengarkan dirinya sendiri. Padahal tanpa Aku, dunia tidak memiliki apa-apa dan hanyalah debu. Tanpa Aku, hanya ada kejahatan dan sengsara, maka semakin lama kamu berpisah dari Aku, semakin besar kejahatan, sengsara, dan derita yang menantimu. Kamu berpikir bahwa sekularisme adalah hal yang baik, sesungguhnya tidak. Justru itu adalah kutukan setan yang terbesar bagi tatanan dunia.

Pada Era Damai nanti, di mana hati-Ku yang Mahakudus dan hati ibu-Ku yang Tak Bercela menang dan berkuasa, kamu akan melihat seperti apa tatanan dunia yang Aku kehendaki. Sesungguhnya, memang itu pun bukan tatanan dunia yang paling baik, karena yang sempurna masih akan menunggu sebentar lagi yaitu pada bumi dan langit yang baru. Tatanan yang sempurna itu sekarang tidak dapat dilakukan karena begitu dalamnya manusia jatuh dalam dosa. Sifat kedosaan manusia memutuskan hubungan antara manusia dengan Allah. Sehingga Kami tidak dapat memerintah kamu dengan sempurna.

Namun adalah di antara kamu semua orang-orang yang kudus, yang telah Kami pilih. Hendaklah mereka menjadi pemimpin di antara kamu dalam segala aspek kehidupan. Hendaklah dunia dirajai oleh para kudus, dan bukan oleh pilihan rakyat. Hendaklah Gereja yang memilih para pemerintah dunia, karena artinya Aku sendiri yang memilih para rajamu. Namun bukannya menerima mereka sebagai pemimpin di atas kamu, kamu malah menganiaya mereka dan membunuh segala benih kekudusan di antara pilihan-pilihan Kami. Sungguh, tanggunganmu akan lebih berat daripada Sodom dan Gomora di hari terakhir nanti.

Karena itu, kamu sekarang hidup dalam tatanan yang terburuk, di mana yang berkuasa bukanlah Kami melainkan kamu sendiri dan segala kebobrokan jiwamu. Andaikan kamu, hai manusia, memperbolehkan Kami masuk lebih dalam ke dalam pemerintahan masyarakatmu, maka tentu kamu akan lebih makmur dan sejahtera. Andaikan kamu mau menerima Aku sebagai Tuhanmu dan memperbolehkan Aku merajai duniamu, maka kamu akan melihat kedamaian sejati baik di dalam hatimu ataupun di dalam dunia. Demikian pengajaran-Ku tentang tatanan dunia.

Tentang Doa

Hai manusia, anak-anak-Ku, berdoalah dengan tekun dan sepanjang hidupmu! Sebab tanpa doa kamu tidak akan selamat. Apakah doa itu? Doa tidak lain dan tidak bukan adalah relasimu dengan Tuhan Allahmu, artinya dengan Aku dan dengan Kami. Bagaimana kamu harus berdoa? Aku telah mengajar kamu dalam Kitab Suci, oleh perkataan-Ku sendiri dan juga melalui para rasulku. Sesungguhnya manusia tidak tahu cara berdoa yang benar, maka dalam setiap kali berdoa, kamu telah dibimbing dan dibantu oleh Roh Kudus, Dia sendiri mendoakan kamu bersama Aku kepada Bapa kita di surga.

Aku telah bersabda kepadamu, mintalah dan kamu akan diberi, carilah dan kamu akan menemukan, dan ketuklah maka pintu akan dibukakan bagimu. Namun jangan kamu mengira bahwa kamu berdoa untuk mengendalikan Aku, tapi justru kamu berdoa supaya Aku mengendalikan kamu. Sebab itu Yakobus telah menyampaikan sabda-Ku, bahwa jika kamu berdoa dan doamu tidak dikabulkan, artinya kamu berdoa dengan tidak benar atau permintaanmu itu tidak benar.

Kamu berdoa untuk mengubah dirimu, untuk mendekatkan dirimu kepada Aku dan kepada Kami, bukan mengubah Kami. Maka jika kamu ingin berubah dan menjadi kudus, yang adalah kewajibanmu dan kewajiban setiap manusia, berdoalah dengan tekun, jadikanlah hidupmu menjadi hidup doa yang tak terputus setiap saat. Dengan itu pastilah kamu akan menjadi seorang yang kudus dan berkenan kepada Kami di surga.

Doa sebenarnya sederhana dan mudah, tapi juga sulit. Kamu hanya perlu masuk ke kamarmu di mana tidak ada orang yang melihat, menutup pintumu dan berbicara satu lawan satu dengan-Ku. Kamu boleh berbicara kepada-Ku, tapi saat berbicara sadarilah siapa dirimu dan siapa Aku, dengan itu kamu akan berdoa dengan lebih baik. Namun, janganlah kamu lupa untuk mendengarkan tanggapan-Ku pula, bacalah Kitab Suci, dengarkanlah orang lain yang lebih baik darimu, bacalah tanda-tanda dunia, dan kelak kamu dapat mendengarkan suara-Ku sendiri di dalam hatimu.

Sebab doa adalah relasi, maka bukan hanya kamu yang harus berbicara tapi Aku juga harus berbicara dan saat itu kamu harus mendengarkan. Dengan doa kamu akan diubahkan, bukan hanya dengan menerima rahmat dari-Ku, tapi juga dengan mengenali kehendak-Ku bagimu. Tanpa doa, bagaimana kamu akan mendengarkan suara-Ku dan perintah-Ku kepadamu? Sebab kebanyakan orang hidup menurut pikiran mereka sendiri, dan kehendak mereka sendiri, tapi tidak mendengarkan kehendak-Ku dan tidak mengikuti kehendak-Ku. Karena itu mereka tidak mendapatkan kemuliaan yang besar di surga dan banyak pula yang jatuh ke dalam api yang kekal.

Doa menurut perkataanmu sendiri tidaklah buruk, tapi kalau kamu ingin berdoa dengan lebih baik lagi, berdoalah dalam persekutuan dengan Gereja. Artinya, ikutlah doa yang tertinggi yaitu misa, ibadat harian, dan juga doa tertinggi yang bukan liturgi, yaitu doa Rosario. Sebab semua doa itu besar kuasanya di hadapan-Ku dan karena dalam rosario ibu-Ku sendiri yang meminta kepada-Ku maka pastilah Aku akan mendengarkannya dan mengabulkan doa yang layak dikabulkan bagimu. Sebab perkataan-perkataan itu bukanlah perkataanmu sendiri yang seringkali tidak layak dan tidak pantas, melainkan perkataan yang kudus, yang Kami rancang sendiri dan Kami berikan kepadamu untuk didoakan.

Setelah kamu berdoa dengan benar dan baik sepanjang hidupmu, kamu akan diubahkan menjadi gambar-Ku yang lebih jernih lagi, tidak ternodai oleh dosa-dosamu. Kamu akan memperoleh kesadaran baru, bahwa berdoa bukan sekadar untuk meminta dan meminta, tapi kamu akan berdoa untuk menikmati kehadiran dan penyertaan-Ku. Kamu akan berdoa semata-mata karena doa itu menyenangkan dan mendamaikan. Sebagaimana kamu senang berbicara dengan orang-orang yang kamu kasihi, begitulah kamu akan berdoa. Demikian pengajaran-Ku tentang doa.

Tentang Karya Kasih

Namun doa yang tidak berbuah adalah doa yang sia-sia, dan artinya orang itu tidak berdoa dengan baik atau sesuai dengan kaidah yang Aku telah nyatakan. Buah doa adalah karya kasih, dan karya kasih hanya berarti pekerjaan yang sesuai dengan ajaran-Ku sebagaimana ternyatakan dalam ajaran Gereja. Karya kasih yang menyeluruh adalah hidup yang sesuai dengan ajaran-Ku sebagaimana ternyatakan dalam ajaran Gereja. Karya Kasih yang paling murni adalah segala pekerjaan yang menaati kehendak-Ku dan kehendak Kami di surga.

Maka kebaikan memiliki derajat-derajat yang berbeda, di mana kamu dapat memiliki karya yang baik tapi tidak sempurna karena kamu mengikuti kebaikan pada derajatmu sendiri dan bukan pada derajat-Ku. Kebanyakan orang dipuaskan oleh kebaikan mereka sendiri dan bukan pada kebaikan Allah. Cara untuk melaksanakan karya kasih secara sempurna adalah dengan doa dan pencarian Kehendak Allah. Setelah kamu menemukan kehendak-Ku, laksanakanlah selalu dan taatilah suara-Ku selalu maka kamu akan berbuah karya kasih secara sempurna pula. Orang berpikir bahwa mereka lebih tahu apa yang baik secara sempurna, padahal tidak, dan dengan itu mereka bisa saja bertindak secara tidak tepat dan malah menggagalkan diri mereka sendiri.

Namun umumnya karya kasih akan dimulai pada tingkat yang sederhana, pada doa dan pembelajaran Kehendak Allah. Setelah itu barulah kamu akan diutus kepada orang lain setelah dirimu diubahkan. Anggaplah bahwa Kami akan mengajar engkau dahulu sebelum Kami memberikan tugas-tugas yang lebih berat. Maka bersabarlah dan janganlah kamu tergesa-gesa, tapi percayalah saja pada suara dan setiap perintah Kami. Segala hal akan diberikan dan terjadi pada waktunya. Demikian pengajaran-Ku tentang Karya Kasih.

Tentang Kekudusan

Apa itu kekudusan? Kekudusan adalah kedekatan dengan-Ku. Kedekatan dengan Allah tidaklah sama dengan bagaimana manusia menafsirkan kedekatan. Ada kedekatan fisik, tapi ada juga kedekatan batin. Kedekatan dengan Allah melampaui kedekatan manusiawi. Sebab kedekatan batin saja tidak cukup untuk menggambarkan kekudusan. Kedekatan dengan Allah tidak seperti 2 orang yang bersahabat tapi nyatanya hanya saling memanfaatkan. Kedekatan dengan Allah adalah suatu persahabatan yang tidak simetris, melainkan ada yang lebih berkuasa dan lebih tinggi secara mutlak, yaitu Allah.

Namun kekudusan adalah persahabatan yang paling murni dan sejati, di mana manusia meniru Allah sebaik mungkin dan menjadi gambar-Nya yang paling baik di antara segala ciptaan Allah. Adapula sekalipun Allah lebih tinggi, tapi segala kebaikan di dalam persahabatan itu akhirnya diperuntukkan manusia dan bukan bagi Allah. Sebab Allah adalah Kebaikan itu sendiri yang tidak dapat menjadi lebih baik lagi, karena Dia sudah yang paling baik. Manusialah yang dapat bertumbuh dalam kebaikan, dan karena itu segala kebaikan Ilahi diperuntukkan kebaikan manusia.

Bagaimana mencapai kekudusan? Secara sederhana, ikutilah kehendak Allah yang dinyatakan dalam Firman-Nya, artinya dalam Aku dan dalam segala ajaran-Ku. Sekarang pertanyaan berikutnya, bagaimana melaksanakan kehendak Allah? Sesungguhnya, Aku telah menyatakannya dalam Kitab Suci dan segala ajaran Gereja. Maka pelajarilah semuanya itu dan laksanakanlah dengan baik. Namun bagaimana kamu dapat memiliki kekuatan dan sumber daya untuk melaksanakan semua itu? Jawabannya adalah berdoa.

Dengan doa, kamu mengenali kehendak-Ku, dan dengan doa, kamu memperoleh segala rahmat yang kau butuhkan untuk melaksanakan kehendak-Ku. Itulah tujuan inti dari doa, untuk memperoleh rahmat demi kekudusan. Segala doa yang telah Kami berikan kepadamu, hanya memiliki tujuan itu, mengantarkan kamu untuk semakin mirip dengan Kami dan artinya semakin bersahabat dengan Kami. Sebab dalam kemiripan dengan Kamilah kamu mengenal Kami dan menjadi dekat dengan Kami. Itulah persahabatan yang paling berharga yang dapat kamu peroleh.

Apakah buah terbesar dari kekudusan? Tidak lain dan tidak bukan adalah kebahagiaan kekal di surga. Seberapa kudus dirimu dalam kerja samamu dengan kehendak Allah, akan menentukan seberapa besar kebahagiaanmu bersama Kami di dalam surga nanti. Ya, setiap orang akan menerima kebahagiaan yang berbeda-beda menurut apa yang layak mereka dapatkan nanti, tapi tidak akan ada iri hati atau dengki. Semua orang akan dipuaskan menurut kapasitas mereka masing-masing. Itulah harapan yang membahagiakan. Demikian segala hal yang harus Aku sampaikan kepadamu dalam tulisan ini.

 

Dictation 4

 Jesus: My child Ignas, this dictation is for you, and this conversation will mostly be for you. Yet the fruits of our conversation shall resound throughout the ages until I finally return. It will bear fruit for others, but you must be patient. Now I shall speak on some matters. I desire a covenant with you, just you, that will help you bear more fruit as you live more fully in my Will. I will tell you now what we shall discuss together. First is the covenant, second is the routines, third is the great plan, fourth is on pranic healing, fifth is on graces in prayer. That is what I have revealed to you for now. If there are additional topics, surely it will be revealed to you.

Jesus: Now our covenant is this, that you shall act completely according to my will from now on. Everything you do, you must present before me and you must seek my blessings and approval. Anything you do outside of that is contrary to my will and you will find yourself failing. I shall not give you the right of choice anymore, instead I shall give you commands for you to follow and through this you shall bear fruit for your own salvation and the salvation of others. This covenant is effective upon you giving your word for this covenant.

Ignas: Then I submit myself to Your Will at this exact sentence.

Jesus: Then you are now mine and completely mine, sin no more. I will now speak about your routines. You must do the routine that we have established together. That is to write down my dictations, to read the Bible, to read the secular news, to study art, music and drawing, and to write the stories of Nesiya which I shall reveal to you. Then you must also pray the Rosary 4 times at once each day. Yet you will not act outside of my will, in each act you shall do it in my will such that you are an extension of me.

Jesus: You will also speak my word to others as I ask it of you. That is you are to be an evangelist, you are to preach the Gospel of My salvation in words and in deeds. You are to preach my words to your friends which I shall announce to you but I will not declare it here for their own safety. Now Ignas, do you have any questions for Me regarding the routines?

Ignas: Why must I read secular news?

Jesus: At the recommendation of your father. That is the sole reason. However, you recognize the benefits as well to simply expand your scope of knowledge, even if it is not completely related to our mission. You are to respond to the general idea of the text and to the specifics of the text as well. In the manner of the responses I shall provide you with an order later on. Now give Me your second question.

Ignas: Why must I write of Nesiya?

Jesus: To practice your narrative writing no less. Yet it is simply to aid you and satisfy you in your desires. However, I see something good in it that I shall command you to write of it. You not need understand too much why I want it to be written, simply that I want it written down. Now on your desires to write philosophy, I shall ask of you to write of it as well, and that will be the new topic of writing after Dictation 3 and Dictation 4. Now I shall reveal to you the great plan for you.

Jesus: You are to remain silent on your own, unless I ask you to speak and pray. This will be your cross, or your difficulty in life. You will live out your university years in holiness. You will then find work somewhere that I shall point out to you in the future. Then at the year of decision, that is 2028, you will leave your work and you will seek the priesthood. Then you shall live out your life as a priest forever until you die. That is the great plan for you. You will live to see great times, your soul will be shaken and you will receive many swords to your soul. But of course how you die and when you die I cannot reveal to you, but you will know when it is close.

Jesus: On pranic healing, for you have no need of it anymore, I command you to leave it and denounce it completely. You shall confess it to your director along with the rest of your heinous sins. But speak nothing to your aunt or to the people there. There shall be a great warning to them and they will be given the chance to repent or to die. I shall destroy pranic healing and all other opposition to the Church in the 3 days of darkness, and in the Era of Peace it will be nothing but history. While there is some truth in such esoteric disciplines, it is not of my grace and it is unreliant on my graces. They seek the truth independently of my Church, and so they trust themselves more than they trust Me.

Jesus: On the graces of prayer I shall reveal to you this important truth. It is known implicitly throughout the Church, but I shall make it explicit to you. It is true that for you to be able to do anything at all, you require grace. What is grace? Grace is simply a free gift from Me to you. For your very existence is a grace, then you need grace to do anything at all. However, when you pray and it is according to my Will, you will be given more graces such that you can do my Will. If you do not pray, then it will not be given to you. You indeed have the initial grace, but the additional graces that shall be given to you if you pray will not be given as you have not prayed. That is the law of prayer.

Jesus: Now, on the matter of your authority and your anointing. You shall prepare yourself to the priesthood from now, and the manner of your preparation is by the covenant that we have established among ourselves. For that reason I have anointed you spiritually, by your baptism and your confirmation, to be my common priest, but then you shall be my actual priest. On your authority, I have given you authority by the Holy Spirit to speak in my name and write in my name. For that reason, fear no more and worry no more when you must preach the Gospel in my name. Receive the Holy Spirit continuously by abandoning yourself to My Will, and you shall maintain your authority and your anointing. If you sin however, you will find yourself removed from my superabundant grace until you repent.

Jesus: On the matter of repentance, it is true that you must confess your sins to have them be absolved, that is wiped off completely from your soul and from My record. However, you can ask for my forgiveness anytime. You can repent anytime and when you have repented and it is true that you have repented, I shall bring you back into my graces and you shall receive graces once more. However, if you do not confess those sins to your confessor, then it is actually a mark that you have not fully repented. For full repentance requires confession of your sins in front of a valid priest. Confession in front of me is partial repentance, and must be done with the commitment to confess when the time comes. This concludes the current Dictation.

Personal Reflection 22

Dalam suatu percakapan rohani yang aku alami 2 hari yang lalu, aku menjumpai suatu gagasan yang menurutku penting dan aku merasakan Roh Kudus menyatakan kepadaku suatu gagasan yang mengimbangi gagasan yang pertama. Gagasan yang pertama menyatakan bahwa hendaknya kita lebih banyak beriman ketimbang berusaha untuk melogiskan segala hal dan mempertanyakan segala hal. Roh Kudus sepertinya tidak setuju, karena berikut gagasan yang Dia sampaikan kepadaku tentang masalah ini.

Alangkah baiknya kita tidak mempertentangkan antara 2 rahmat Allah, yaitu iman dan logika, keduanya sama-sama dibutuhkan dalam suatu kesatuan yang harmonis dan seimbang. Sesungguhnya iman tanpa logika adalah takhayul dan logika tanpa iman juga adalah kesombongan manusia belaka. Mungkin kita pernah mendengar istilah "Fides quaerens intellectum", iman mencari pengertian, tapi pada saat yang sama "Intellectum quaerens fides", pengertian mencari iman. 

Saat disatukan, iman dan logika harusnya saling menguatkan dan semakin mendekatkan diri kita kepada Allah. Sebenarnya gagasan pertama itu bukannya salah, hanya saja kalau tidak dipahami dengan benar dapat menimbulkan pandangan bahwa logika bertentangan dengan iman. Sesungguhnya kebenaran tidak dapat melawan kebenaran, jadi karena iman dan logika sama-sama mengarah pada kebenaran, tidak mungkin mereka berlawanan, apalagi mereka juga sama-sama karunia dari Allah. 

Mungkin penjelasan yang lebih baik adalah jangan kita mengandalkan pemikiran kita sendiri tentang yang benar, tapi mengandalkan pemikiran Allah. Percayalah, pemikiran Allah itu jauh lebih logis dan rasional daripada pemikiran kita. Justru pemikiran kita yang hampir selalu tidak logis dan tidak rasional karena tidak berdasar pada Kebenaran yaitu Allah sendiri. Jadi justru kita harus sangat keras dalam menggunakan logika, tapi logika yang diberikan Allah dan bukan logika ciptaan kita sendiri. Karena logika yang kita buat sendiri ya mohon maaf, ngawur. Kecuali logika itu sebenarnya berasal dari Allah tapi kita salah mengenali sebagai ciptaan kita sendiri, ya itu juga salah tapi setidaknya logikanya sudah tepat.

Jadi bagaimana dengan klaim orang-orang bahwa logika dan iman itu berlawanan dan harus dipisahkan supaya melindungi keduanya? Tentu saja salah. Jika kita berada pada kondisi batin yang tepat dan relasi yang benar dengan Allah, maka kita akan melihat bagaimana iman yang baik justru membuat logika kita semakin baik, dan logika yang benar juga akan memperkuat iman kita. Ingat bahwa salah satu karunia Roh Kudus adalah pengertian, dan bukan hanya pengertian hal-hal yang rohani tapi juga hal-hal yang duniawi dalam keterkaitannya dengan hal-hal yang rohani. Jadi jangan takut berpikir, selama kita berpikir menurut aturan berpikir yang Allah sudah berikan dan bukan menurut aturan yang sembrono dan tidak benar.

Dictation 2

 Ignas, kamu meragukan dirimu sendiri, maka kamu meragukan aku, yang menciptakan kamu dan memberikan kamu rahmat untuk menerima aku dan segala hal yang hendak aku katakan bagimu dan bagi seluruh dunia. Tinggalkanlah segala keraguanmu dan dengarkan aku saja. Sebab aku telah memberimu kuasa untuk menghardik dan mewarta kepada dunia. Kalau perlu, sampaikanlah kepada pembimbing rohanimu tentang hal ini. Namun sesungguhnya, aku memberikan kuasa kepada semua pengikut dan muridku untuk melakukan hal ini. Ini adalah kuasa yang aku berikan kepada Gereja secara keseluruhan, apakah kamu berpikir bahwa hanya hierarki yang memiliki kuasa ini?

Gereja adalah tubuhku, dan setiap anggota terhubung denganku sekalipun dia sejauh jarak ujung kaki dan kepala. Masalahnya adalah apakah setiap anggotaku itu ingin menjalin hubungan yang lebih dekat denganku atau tidak? Kamu telah memilih hal yang tepat untuk mendengarkan aku dan menjalin hubungan yang lebih dekat denganku. Dan karena itu kamu mengetahui bahwa kamu sebagai anggota tubuhku yaitu Gereja, memiliki kuasa untuk mewartakan kebenaran kepada dunia. Kelak kamu akan dapat mewarta dengan namamu sendiri, tapi sesungguhnya kamu mewartakan perkataanku dalam satu cara atau yang lain, maka aku menyatakan bahwa ini adalah perkataan kita bersama dalam namaku.

Sebab gagasan yang kamu miliki ini berasal dariku tapi kamu yang merangkai perkataan-perkataan ini. Kamu memahami kebenaran-kebenaran universal dan kamu tinggal merangkai ke dalam perkataan-perkataan ini sehingga sesungguhnya masih merupakan perkataanku, sekalipun dihasilkan oleh otakmu. Orang banyak tidak akan memahami konsep ini, tapi yang penting adalah kamu sendiri memahami bagaimana kita berbicara dan berkomunikasi, bagaimana aku hadir di dalam dirimu dan mewujud dalam setiap perkataan yang kamu tuliskan. Ketahuilah Ignas, kita bersatu lebih erat daripada yang kamu pikirkan. Begitulah persatuan antara aku dan setiap anggota Gereja, hanya saja ada yang menyadarinya dan mengupayakannya, dan ada pula yang tidak menyadarinya dan tidak mengupayakannya.

Kamu sendiri telah memperingatkan sahabatmu tentang rasa kepuasan. Janganlah kamu cepat puas, kepuasan itu hanya perasaan sesaat. Namun pandanglah kekekalan dan janji-janjiku kepadamu. Bertindaklah menurut keseluruhan akal budimu demi dirimu sendiri dan demi aku. 

Dictation 1

Surat Awal

Hai Ignas! Pada saat ini kamu lelah, tapi dalam kelelahan dan kelemahanmulah kuasa-Ku menjadi sempurna. Maka dengarkanlah apa yang Aku katakan padamu dan tuliskanlah segala hal yang Aku katakan kepadamu. Pertama, hendaklah kamu menuliskan segala hal ini di dalam blogmu supaya orang banyak dapat mengetahui apa yang hendak aku sampaikan kepadamu dan kepada seluruh dunia. Di mana ada perkataan yang hendak kurahasiakan sampai kepenuhan waktu, aku akan menyatakannya kepadamu. Namun sekarang dan untuk sesi ini aku akan meminta supaya tulisan ini dibuat publik.

Pertama, tulislah ini bagi pembimbing rohanimu. Aku meminta Ignas untuk menyampaikan pesan-pesanku kepadamu dan akan disampaikan kepadamu lewat surel. Setiap bulan bacalah sedikit apa yang telah aku tuliskan dan sampaikan suatu balasan kepada sahabatku mengenai perkataan-perkataan ini. Aku menugaskan ini kepadamu bukan dalam kapasitas pribadimu saja, tapi dalam jabatanmu sebagai wakil Gereja. Jangan takut, aku pasti akan membimbingmu dengan Rohku. Sebagai wakil Gereja, kamu adalah pagar dan tembok besar yang memastikan Ignas tetap berada pada jalan yang benar, bersama dengan kesadarannya sendiri sebagai anggota tubuhku.

Kedua, tulislah ini bagi doktermu. Salam damai bagimu, hai Bu Dokter. Aku telah memilih engkau menjadi penjaga bersama seorang imam untuk menjadi tembok kewarasan bagi Ignas. Ignas akan mengirimkan perkataan-perkataan dariku kepadamu dan kamu akan menanggapi perkataan-perkataan tersebut demi kewarasan Ignas. Aku tahu bahwa ada kemungkinan kamu akan memperingatkan Ignas terhadap perkataan-perkataan ini, atau terhadap suara batin yang dia alami. Namun jangan takut! Sebab Allah menyertai dia dan melindunginya dari segala hal yang berbahaya, tapi juga memberikan rahmat yang berlimpah baginya dan inilah salah satu rahmatku baginya.

Ketiga, tulislah ini bagi dirimu sendiri. Aku akan mengulang apa yang telah aku jelaskan kepadamu sebelumnya. Mulai sekarang kamu akan hidup bersamaku selamanya, dan dalam setiap tindakan kamu harus menghadirkan aku di dalamnya. Tugasmu untuk saat ini masihlah sama, yaitu mendoakan Rosario 4 kali dalam satu kali jalan, dan selain itu mempelajari Kitab Suci dengan bimbinganku dan mempersiapkan kuliahmu. Janganlah kamu mengkhawatirkan tulisan-tulisan saat kuliah, aku sendiri akan membimbing kamu. Maka apa yang sudah tertulis tetaplah tertulis, tapi mulai sekarang, aku sendiri yang akan membimbing kamu untuk menulis apa yang harus dituliskan bagi dunia.

Sekarang, berjaga-jagalah dan teruslah mendengarkan suaraku di dalam jiwamu sendiri supaya kamu dapat menulis apa yang aku ingin kau tuliskan. Kamu telah merasakan suatu dorongan untuk menyampaikan suatu pesanku kepada sahabatmu, dan sesungguhnya kamu benar. Maka inilah yang harus kamu lakukan bagi sahabatmu. Pada esok hari, saat kamu bertemu dengannya setelah Ekaristi, tawarkanlah pesan berikut ini kepadanya, dan kamu akan melakukan suatu kebaikan besar baginya. Pesanku adalah sebagai berikut, 

"Hai (nama dirahasiakan), sesungguhnya kamu memiliki Ignas sebagai sahabatmu dengan suatu alasan tertentu dan kamu sendiri sudah mengetahui mengapa aku menetapkan dia sebagai sahabatmu. Aku mengenali engkau dan segala pekerjaanmu, aku menghargai keinginanmu untuk bertambah dalam kekudusan dan persetujuanmu terhadap tawaran Ignas. Namun aku datang untuk memanggil engkau ke tingkat kekudusan yang lebih tinggi. Tentu saja aku tidak memaksamu, tapi aku memberikan tawaran. Teruslah merayakan Ekaristi setiap minggu, sebab akan datang waktunya di mana kalian tidak dapat merayakan Ekaristi untuk sementara waktu. Namun waktu itu singkat dan setelah itu kamu akan mampu menikmati diriku kembali. Aku memberikan pesan ini sebab jika Ignas memberikan pesan atas namanya sendiri, maka dampaknya pada akal budimu akan lebih rendah ketimbang aku menyampaikan pesan ini atas namaku sendiri. Sesungguhnya kamu sudah tahu segala Firman yang hendak aku ulangi kepadamu, sebab Ignas sudah pernah banyak menyampaikannya kepadamu. Sekarang, kamu telah mempelajari dari sahabatmu bagaimana mempersatukan hidupmu denganku, teruskanlah. Permintaanku yang berikutnya adalah supaya kamu mulai membaca Kitab Suci dan merenungkannya dengan baik, boleh mengulang bacaan mingguan tapi kamu renungkan pada suatu waktu teduh bersama aku. Lalu, berdoalah supaya kamu dapat mendengarkan suaraku sebagaimana Ignas mendengarkan suaraku. Jikalau kamu sungguh mendoakannya dengan penuh iman, maka kelak aku pun akan datang kepadamu dan berbicara denganmu selayaknya seorang sahabat. Sesungguhnya aku menghendaki setiap orang mampu berbicara denganku secara lancar, sebagaimana Ignas berbicara denganku, dan ini dapat dicapai setiap orang, tapi sayangnya orang-orang tidak meminta kepadaku, padahal ini sangat memudahkan dalam hidup rohani. Demikianlah pesanku kepadamu untuk sekarang. Namun andaikan kamu memiliki pertanyaan, kenapa melalui Ignas? Alasannya adalah karena hubunganmu denganku belum begitu kuat seperti Ignas, jadi tentu saja aku harus menggunakan seorang perantara untuk berbicara kepadamu. Ini memang bukan pertama kali Ignas mengatakan dia menerima pesan dariku, tapi yakinilah bahwa semakin lama Ignas semakin dimurnikan dan karena itu suaraku yang dia terima menjadi lebih jernih dan lebih baik. Maka percayalah kepada sahabatmu, karena dengan itu kamu percaya kepadaku. Aku memberikan berkatku kepadamu untuk seluruh hidupmu."

Sekarang Ignas, teruslah menulis sampai pukul 7. Pada pukul 7 mandilah dengan segera, lalu bersiaplah untuk pergi ke gereja dan untuk merayakan Ekaristi. Aku akan terus mengatakan kepadamu apa saja yang harus kamu tuliskan. 

Kepada Dunia

Ignas, tuliskanlah ini bagiku. Aku merindukan kasih umat manusia kepadaku, tapi kebanyakan orang menolak aku. Sesungguhnya aku berbicara kepadamu melalui sesamamu, tapi kamu menolak mendengar aku. Karena kamu menolak aku, maka aku akan menjatuhkan penghakiman yang keras bagimu. Sekarang, aku tahu bahwa pesan ini tidak akan sampai kepada banyak orang, sebab waktunya akan segera tiba di mana penghakiman itu datang. Namun hendaklah dia yang memiliki mata dan telinga, membaca dan mendengar perkataanku ini. 

Aku mengasihi dunia, karena itulah aku datang pertama kalinya dan untuk itu pula aku akan datang kembali dengan segera. Bertobatlah, sebab aku datang dengan segera! Ketahuilah bahwa kepenuhan iman dan Allah hanya ada padaku, yaitu Yesus Kristus, juruselamatmu. Maka bagi kamu yang belum mengenal aku, carilah aku dan kamu akan selamat. Bagi kamu yang sudah mengenali aku, apa yang kamu tunggu? Segeralah berlari menujuku jika kamu mau selamat. 

Namun aku memperingatkan, bahwa iman tanpa kasih tidaklah berguna. Sebab sesungguhnya iman tanpa kasih adalah iman yang palsu, iman yang sejati pasti berbuah kasih. Jadi jika kamu masih hanya berkata-kata tanpa bertindak, camkanlah pesan ini atau kamu akan terkutuk! Sungguh gerbang neraka terbuka luas bagi mereka yang terus hidup dalam dosa tanpa bertobat. Ketahuilah makna pertobatan, tidak berhenti pada sakramen tobat, tapi berbuah menjadi kasih yang sejati yang lahir dari iman yang sejati. 

Maka aku berkata padamu, mulailah dengan dirimu sendiri dan keluargamu. Kalau kamu tidak dapat mengasihi keluargamu sendiri, bagaimana kamu dapat mengasihi sesamamu yang ada di luar? Namun kalau kamu ditolak dan dibenci oleh keluargamu sendiri karena aku, janganlah bersusah hati, sebab apa yang kamu kehilangan karena aku, kamu akan memperoleh dalam bentuk lain. Apapun yang terjadi padamu, tetaplah berusaha untuk melayani dan mengasihi dimulai dari hal-hal dan wilayah yang paling kecil dan dekat denganmu. Kalau kamu setia pada perkara-perkara kecil, aku akan mempercayakan kepadamu perkara-perkara yang lebih besar.

Personal Reflection 21

 The difference or distinction between my thoughts and God's thoughts begins to blur. Perhaps this is where it shall end and the merging of my thoughts and God's thoughts begin. In truth, when one abandons all attachments, or better yet, present those attachments to God, and becomes united with God, then they become a united force facing the world as one under the greater name of God. It is a spiritual marriage, where you exist, but only as a name. That is what I desire, and sometimes achieve, but am in lifelong purification until I am united with God.

God speaks eternally, His Word is not just a linguistic word. In fact, to call that aspect of Him as Word is mere symbolism. Obviously His Word is not mere linguistic word, but in fact it is His very substance and essence. His Word is Himself. This Word is known to the world as Jesus Christ, but known to God as Himself. Now we receive Christ sometimes in a partial form, as actual language. When I write these words out of God's mouth, then it is in a way, "Christ".

Now language itself is imperfect, yet it has been revealed to me that in some form, language can be as perfect as it can be, though never being Perfection itself. For language is by nature an image, a symbol, a sign, and never the true reality itself, though itself it is a reality. Then there can be Perfect Language, not even any language that transcends our understanding, but instead condescends the supernatural or the entire reality into our own understanding. The Perfect Language, is closely related to the Perfect Book, for the Perfect Book is a collection of Perfect Language. 

There is an urge within me, a desire, that has to be fulfilled, and this is its fulfillment.

God: You cannot see my words clearly for I am beyond words. Yet you are correct when you say that I can be present in words, in imperfect language, and so there is perfect language to the extent that language can have my attributes or be similar to me. All things are good in their similarity to me, not the other way around. But you are correct as well when you wish for me to utter something great. Woe! The days are evil and last, prepare the road of your souls for my imminent and soon return! I shall come like a thief at night, when none suspects, but my sheep will be ready and they will know when I come. They will see the signs that I have prepared for them and then they will greet me happily. The rest, the goats, will not be prepared and they will not be ready when I come. 

God: There is something that has to come out, but it is stuck in your throat, and now at the tip of your tongue. You do not know what must be announced to the world. You see it but you cannot comprehend it and thus it cannot be expressed with your words. Surrender to me and I shall reveal what must be revealed.

God: I have not come to reveal dates, those have been revealed by others. I come to reveal myself to the world. This revelation is merely an affirmation and a repetition of that which has been revealed by my Church for centuries last. Let the world know this. Preach the Gospel to the entire world, preach God.

Yeshua: Ignas, this is not for you, but for the entire world. I speak now not as the humanity of myself, but in my office as God. Do not misinterpret my words, it is my office as God but it is also my nature as God. For the fools and the wicked will easily and desirably twist my words to their own doom and perdition.

Yeshua: You shall now listen to what I have to say and write down whatever I command you to write down for the world. You shall write these in your blog posts in your series of Personal Reflections. But for you have recognized the spiritual marriage, from now on you are to have me in you forever. For any action that you are to undertake, you are not to do it on your own but you are to be an extension of my being. For that reason, when I ask you to sleep, it is not you who sleeps, but I too who sleep. This is the only way forward, this is the only way you can succeed in your life, without my presence in you you will fail. Your prayers have been heard and I am your answer. You are not to do anything as your own person anymore, but merely as the extension of my own acts. All Christians are called to do this life, in their own ways. But the ways converge upon one end, the denial of the self and the complete abandonment of the will and of the being to Me. Follow me, Ignas, and you shall be victorious. I shall now take over all writing other than that which you must make under your own name. Your dreams of perfect language shall soon come true, my dear Ignas. Thus this is where your personal words end, and where your records of my dictations to you begin.

Story 4

 I: My God, in full honesty, I feel that it is no longer meaningful to write anything, be it about You or about anything else.

Y: Yet you recognize the meaning in your intellect, it is only your feelings which do not recognize the meaning.

I: That is much true.

Y: Your task remains the same for the day, to pray the Rosary and write down your understandings of Scripture. That is how you shall serve me in these times.

I: I understand full well the meaning of those 2 tasks, but what about what we are doing now?

Y: It is meaningful to the extent that I want you to do this.

I: Is it not better for me to sleep?

Y: Yet you cannot sleep, so we go for the next best option.

On Holiness

 The Lord has ordained me to write on holiness, regardless of how unholy and wretched I am. This is what I understand about holiness. Holiness is an attribute of God, to what I understand it is of God whole. Things holy are things near to God, having a special proximity to God which I understand is measured by similarity. The more similar a thing is to God, then the holier is that thing. As such, man compared to the animals is holy by virtue of his rational immortal soul. Yet even among man there are degrees of holiness.

I am not ordained to write about the theory of holiness, but primarily the practice of holiness, with theory serving only as the basis. Why is holiness important? Because we are called to holiness. Why are we called to holiness? For the holiness that we possess shall determine our reception of the greatest good that is God in heaven, or even our eternal loss of God, in what we know as hell. Now our fundamental holiness or righteousness is not merited of any of our works, but by the blood of Christ alone.

Yet we still have to cooperate with the grace merited by the blood of Christ in order to fully realize the holiness in ourselves. In other words, while our fundamental salvation is not a wage for any of our works, we still have to do works in order to maintain that salvation. Then, works are insufficient but necessary for salvation. Thus the works that I am about to explain are the kind of works that advances one's holiness for the maintenance, sustenance, and perfection of one's own salvation.

There are 2 works of holiness, the works of love and the works of faith. The works of love are known by most people, despite the controversies on what constitutes as love. The works of faith are lesser known because it is to my observation that most people are practical atheists, some by their own rejection of God and some by no fault of their own. The relationship between works of faith and works of love is that faith supports love, and love is the manifestation of faith.

The works of faith are constituted by 2 things, prayer and study. Prayer is the foundation of all spiritual life, without prayer man dies. What is prayer? Prayer is both simple and difficult at the same time. Scripture attests to this that we do not know how to pray. However, in practice, prayer is as simple as speaking to God, because that is the essence of prayer. The purpose of prayer is 4 things, glorification, thanksgiving, forgiveness, and petition. We pray to praise God, to thank God, to ask for His mercy, and to ask Him for graces.

To praise God is to praise the Supreme Good for what He is, the Supreme Good. It is both useful and an end of its own. It is an end of its own as it is the final purpose in a sense, to praise the Goodness that is God as an expression of our love to God. It is useful as it builds within us respect and honor towards God, or piety. To thank God is to acknowledge everything that He has done for us, which is only good. This also has the same properties as praising God. It is an expression of love, respect, honor, and piety.

We ask mercy from God for we sin always, the perfection of this asking of mercy is in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. We cannot absolve ourselves of our own sins, only the priest in persona Christi can do that. When asking for the Lord's mercy, we also ask for grace so that we do not sin anymore in the future. The true purpose of asking for mercy in personal prayer is to remind ourselves of our sins, to commit not to sin again, and to remind ourselves that God is rich in mercy and forgiveness, for He is Mercy itself.

The final end of prayer, petitions, are important as God Himself commands us to ask of Him graces in order we shall obtain those graces. In my experience, God wants us not to pray many things but pray this only, "Give us the graces necessary to do Your Will." This is perfectly manifest in the Lord's Prayer, "Thy Will be done...," "Give us our daily bread". The petitive prayer, when done in full faith, is truly efficacious and will give us the graces necessary to do God's Will, which is what advances us in holiness.

That is the formal kind of prayer, where we pray to God as God. However, there are times where we seek to pray to God as a Friend, and this is where informal prayer comes in. Informal prayer is simply the pure and honest expression of our self to God, whatever that is. It might be anger, happiness, sadness, or even despair. Then we surrender ourselves to God and sink in His ocean of love and mercy. Here we speak anything to God, but we must be aware still of our relationship to Him. Why do we pray essentially? To be holy, to be closer to God. So if our prayers are done in disrespect of Him, then it is no prayer, but perhaps only self-glorification.

It is not necessary to worry ourselves too much on recognizing God's answer to our petitions. Some effort on our part is necessary, that is a general awareness of God's graces, but at important occassions God will make you aware of His answer, through any source that exists in this world. Once God has answered your prayer, do not forget to praise and thank Him for answering your prayer and for being very loving to us. At one point of life, God may graciously reveal Himself in a more intimate way, perhaps through interior voices or through other forms of communication, unique to each person and individual.

Study is principally the study of God's Word, the totality of His Word, that is Christ, as manifest in the teachings of the Church which is the Sacred Scripture and the Sacred Tradition. Why do we study His Word? To understand Him and His Will more and so we may be made holy by our work of His Will that is Love. We also study His Word to love Him better, for you cannot love what you do not know or understand. Now our knowledge of God on this temporal earth may be inadequate, but it can still be true and substantial, that is the means by which we love God.

These 2 works, the work of prayer and the work of study, has one unified purpose, equipping us with the resources necessary to do the Divine Will. That Divine Will is of course the works of love. The works of love are the main and ordinary means of becoming holy and thus the perfection of our salvation. Conventionally and I agree upon this, the works of love are divided into the corporal and spiritual works of love or mercy. The corporal works concerns with the body while the spiritual works concern with the soul. 

In this writing I wish to unite those 2 works of love into a single expression, "Preach the Gospel". To preach the Gospel and the Good News of the Kingdom of God is not merely the preaching of the Christian faith, but also all good works of love of God's Will. For all the works of love in some way preach the Christian faith that has its summation in Love, for as Scripture attests, God is Love. In taking care of the body we empower the soul to do acts of love, and in taking care of the soul we lead the soul to God. So the greatest act of love is not divided but united into a single act of love for all people, just as God is One Single Act of Love.

The practice of love of course begins with one self, but with proper self love and not selfish love. True love is universal, just, and merciful. True discrimination is the differentiation of treatment according to different needs, and not by any other kind of difference. Then love may spread to the family and to our friends, until it spreads to the entire world. Love does not begin with great works, but with the simple works, for if man is found trustworthy on small works then they shall be entrusted with the greater works. It may begin with simply speaking to our family members and friends, hearing their problems, supporting them, and praying for them. 

The work of love is of course simply obedience to the Divine Will. It is not just any work of love that advances our holiness, but that work of love which is united to the Divine Will. Without the Divine Will, that is the Supreme Good, our work becomes meaningless in the eternal run. Thus all of this work, from prayer to studies to love, is useful only when done as fulfillment of the Divine Will, which it certainly is. With that, I conclude my writing for now.

Genesis Response (WIP)

Genesis 1

My God, You have commanded me to write in response to Your Word. This is the beginning of all of my responses. I shall write the responses to each chapter. Oh how many chapters are there in the Bible? I do not remember, but this will be a long project. I do this to serve You and only to serve You. The response is more of an elaboration of what You have said in Scripture. It is an exposition, but let You move my soul so it may also have an actual response to You. Let it begin.

In the beginning, You created the entirety of reality, or to be accurate, that which is created. You are the General, and from You, comes the Particular. You are Pure Existence, Infinite in nature, and thus from You comes all finite things. It is said that You create everything out of nothing. This is true in a certain sense, for You did not assemble things from other things, instead You generate things from the utter void that was once reality. This understanding gives me joy, blessed are You and glory be to You forever.

Adonai, I believe that there is a significance to the ordering of the narrative of creation, and to the descriptions of creation. How there is formlessness in the beginning (Genesis 1:2), and later there shall be a shaped earth. How in the beginning there was darkness (Genesis 1:2)  and later there shall be light. In the beginning there was the particular void, or even the general void which is You, and from the particular void You generate the particular forms and shapes which becomes this universe and all other worlds. 

However I am confused, my Lord. You are the general void, but which interpretation is correct, You create the particular void and use that to become particular form or do You create all things from Yourself, that is the general void? I fear to go against Your Word, to go against Your Church, to go against You. Christ Jesus, help me to understand Your Word. Enlighten my mind, do not let me fall into heresy or even worse schism and apostasy. My Lord Jesus Christ, I trust in You. Then there is also the fact that I do not fathom the meaning of the ordering of the narrative.

Let us continue, it is mentioned multiple times that You saw it is all good, very good in fact. I interpret this to point towards Your goodness, Your nature that is as the Essence of Goodness. I understand this to mean that everything You do can only be for my and our good. As such I must trust in You, to have complete faith in You. Even as I continue to write this response in a dark and desperate mood, I must surrender and trust in You that this is for my own good as well.

Yet this still raises a question within me, are certain things created by man or are they eventually of You as well? Weaponry, games, things man creates to distract themselves, when dissected under absolute meaning, I see that they cannot be good. Are they then from You? How do I know which comes from You and which is not of You? I do not understand this my Lord. Please help me understand, help me to fathom Your acts and Your creatures.

In the first chapter, it is written multiple times that You refer to Yourself in the plural, this is understood to refer to the Trinity. Ah yes, the Trinity, You, Your Essence, Your Nature. A slight contemplation of it already gives me joy in my soul, oh how much more will I enjoy and be happy when I see Your Triune Self directly with the eyes of my soul. I did not realize how much joy I could obtain from reading You. It pains me to understand how much I have offended You from abandoning and leaving You for the times I fell into addiction.

In Genesis 1:26, You said You created mankind in Your image. Yes, I hear the tempting thoughts that it is You who are "created" in our image. Yet my understanding of You disproves that temptation, and You are victorious once again. We are alive like You, we are free like You, we are capable of knowledge like You, we are capable of love like You. To be in Your image means we are similar to You, yet we have fallen from glory, from Your glory. In any case, I honestly still do not understand what it truly means to be in Your image. I feel that I do not have the essence, because I do not have You in complete form. 

In the same verse, it is written what our purpose is, to rule over the earth, and this I understand that You call us to be Your partner in work. That we shall cooperate and be Your extended body, just as we who believe in You become Your mystical body, the Church. I wish to be a worthy partner of Yours, but the burden of sin on my soul makes it difficult to actively choose You. Yet, it feels as if that it is all a matter of choice, of will. If I will it, and ask You with fullness of faith and hope, then it shall be done. 

I thank You my Lord for having asked me of this response. I am reminded of the first truths, the essential truths of my faith, in You. Yet there is still more to come. I think even deep reflection of this first chapter is sufficient to arouse joy in the soul, granted it is guided by the Holy Spirit. However, I now feel sadness, a longing for You, a melancholic feeling for my sins. It is guilt that I feel. I seek Your forgiveness and mercy, please forgive me my God. Glory be to the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, now, always, and for all of eternity, amen.

Genesis 2

It is the 2nd chapter of the book of Genesis. My Lord, You said that You rested on the seventh day, what does this mean? Does it mean that at one point You stopped creating? Yet by Your love You sustain all things. At the same time it feels eschatological, that there shall be a time where all of Your work ceases as it is done. That is the new 8th day, the eternal era, the time after Your Second Coming. That is what I understand from Your Spirit.

In Genesis 2:7, it is said that You breathed life into man, and so from that Your Spirit gave me understanding that our life is divinely inspired. That our life comes from You and is sustained by Your love. Is there a significance to the description of the 4 rivers, is there deeper meaning to it than what I see? For I do not see further, at this point it is only a description of rivers to me. Perhaps it is not important for me, but what part of Your Word is insignificant? Perhaps it is simply not for me to understand at this point. I shall trust You.

It is in Genesis 2:17 that You forbid man from eating the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. But why? Why do You forbid man from doing that? What is the significance of this fruit? Your Spirit gives me understanding that it is simply so that man has the choice to disobey You, but why that choice? It is a mystery to me which I do not understand at this point. I will not pursue it further, I will let it be what it is.

In Genesis 2:18, You said that it is not right for man to be alone, Your Spirit gives me understanding that it is a symbol of not only marriage, but also for all fellowship, friendship, and brotherhood of all humanity. Yet I see now that man is now fractured, but at the same time not all of man is shattered, light of faith still shines forth from many people I know, Your Hope sustains my mind. I still seek a worthy companion for me, but that I surrender into Your hand, my Lord.

Genesis 2:25, I must confess my passions before You, my Lord. That I do have some desire for nudity, for I think the beauty of man must be laid bare, in order to further show Your beauty. Yet it is now corrupted, and it can no longer be restored. Even in the far eternal future what was can no longer be the same, it will never be the same. Yet that is what our hope consists in, the passing away of all things past, letting the past be the past, and subsisting completely in the present. Glory be to the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, as it was in the beginning, now, always, and for all of eternity, amen.

Genesis 3

It is the 3rd chapter of Genesis. In Genesis 3:1, the serpent, which is a manifestation of the devil, or perhaps an agent of him, suggested the first lie, that is to distort and twist the Word of God. Eve's first sin is Genesis 3:3, that God commanded not to touch the fruit, when the true command is only to not eat it. Then the snake continued his lies, as he is the father of lies. However, the best lie is not completely false, it is a mixture of truth and lie, which makes it incredibly dangerous.

In Genesis 3:6, Eve fell and sinned. The wisdom that Genesis 3:6 described is of course a false wisdom, it represents man's attempt to find his own truth, to define his own wisdom and stray away from the Truth and the Wisdom that is God. As such, there is correlation between knowledge and virtue, between understanding and righteousness. Genesis 3:7 confirms part of Satan's words that their eyes will be opened, and indeed their eyes are opened, but not by God's will.

As our first parents have fallen, they become sinful in a deep manner. This is seen in Genesis 3:12, where Adam blamed his wife and God, refusing to take responsibility. Then Eve blamed the snake, and refused to take responsibility as well. With this, God punished Eve with pain in childbearing, and Adam with the curse of the soil. However in Genesis 3:15, He gave the proto-Evangelium, that the offspring of Eve shall bruise the head of the snake and the snake will strike their heel. This is of course reference to Christ.

The punishment for sin is death, and not only spiritual death but also physical death. See how we all die and suffer? That is because of our parent's sin. As such, the curse of childbearing and the soil are not only about that, but also symbols that man shall suffer in his labor. Women shall suffer in their labor of childbearing, and man shall suffer in their labor of working the land. And this is a secret of the Lord, that the sin of Eve disrupted the equality of men and women, and corrupted everyone to be at war with each other.

However, God remains loving to the couple, for He made tunics of skins for the man and his wife in Genesis 3:21. In Genesis 3:22, God said that the man must not be allowed to reach out his hand and pick from the tree of life, lest he lives forever. The Holy Spirit declares this as an act of love, as if man now lives forever, he would instead be in hell. He must die first, die to his sins, and then he may pick from the tree of life that is Christ. This is the response to Genesis 3.

Genesis 4

It is the 4th chapter of Genesis. The Lord God still loves Cain even if Cain is a murderer whose offerings are not looked upon in favor by God. He still guides Cain and makes work to prevent Cain from sin. However, Cain refused to listen to God and kills Abel, his own brother. Even after murder, God preserves Cain's life by marking him and promising sevenfold vengeance against those who would kill Cain. Now the second sin is by Lamech who added to God's Word, making up his own rule of seventy-seven fold vengeance.

This is the response to Genesis 4.

Genesis 5

It is Genesis 5. Verse 2 says that we are blessed by God and made in the likeness of God. Blessed, it means we are given graces and gifts by God. In the likeness of God, it means we are similar to God. We are intellectual and free to love, but also free to hate. That is where our similarities to God consist in.

In verse 24, the mystery of Enoch is mentioned. The common interpretation which I understand is that Enoch was assumed to heaven like Elijah and Mary. Thus Enoch and Elijah, not having died yet shall return to earth to preach against the antichrist.

In verse 29, Noah is described as a consolation in the midst of God's curse on the soil. It is right in a sense that God cursed the land, but it is the sin of man which brought God's curse on the land, and that His curse is a right and just judgement on the original sin of man. Noah will indeed be a consolation, and he is a prototype of Christ.

Thus is the response to Genesis 5.

Genesis 6

It is Genesis 6. Humans are meant to be immortal just as God has no end. However, due to sin humans have brought upon themselves the curse of death, as such in verse 3 God limits the human age to only 120 years. For His Spirit cannot dwell in human beings, "who are only flesh" meaning that they are worldly and think only of fleshly things.

In the following verses, from verse 5 to 7, it describes God's regret having made human beings on earth and plans to rid the surface of the earth of humanity. This is a prototype of the coming chastisements in the end times, which is fastly approaching. However, there is a single man, Noah, who won God's favour, and this Noah is a prototype of Christ. Christ who by His righteousness won the salvation of those who follows Him.

The Spirit reminded me that the stories of Genesis, being older, are more human in nature and as such descriptions of God being a bit more emotional might be found. However, they are imaginations of man of God in man's image. This does not change the truth of who God is, who lives in eternal heavenly time and knows everything in a single point of time.

The following verses speaks of God's instructions to Noah on building the ark. The ark is of course a prototype of the Catholic Church. As such this is the prototypical root of the doctrine of Extra Ecclesiam Nulla Salus, or "There is no salvation outside the Church." Of course the full doctrine is, "All salvation comes from Jesus Christ through the Church." One might ask why God feels regret and wishes to destroy everything in a seemingly "moody" act. The proper answer by the Spirit is that it is "not important" to know.

Thus is the response to Genesis 6.

Genesis 7

It is Genesis 7. This is a continuation of the story of Noah. Noah is a prototype of Christ as the story has a similarity. By the righteousness of one man, those allied with the man is saved by God. Here the number 7 and 40 is mentioned. 7 symbolizes perfection and creation, as the 7 days of creation. God warns of the rain 7 days before, so it symbolizes 7 days of recreation.

40 has historically been a symbol of purification by God, as used in 40 days of Jesus in the desert, and the 40 days of Lent. So the flood is a purification of the earth, and it seems to have an eschatological nature to it as well. That in the end of days, there shall be a great purification of the earth and God will preserve and save the remnant of the purification. 

Thus is the response to Genesis 7.

Genesis 8

It is Genesis 8, in Genesis 8:1, it is written that God has Noah in mind. This shows the loyalty of God, that God is forever loyal to His covenants. Then in Genesis 8:21, God promises to never again curse the earth because of human beings, even if their heart contrives evil from their infancy. This shows God's unending love for us. Thus is the response to Genesis 8.

Genesis 9

It is Genesis 9. God blessed Noah and his family. Here God gives the entire world to humanity for rule and consumption. This is also where God first proclaims that He will eventually judge mankind. God makes a covenant with mankind and all life, that no flood will ever come back (though other methods are not insured against), and the rainbow becomes the proof of His covenant. There is a small story about Noah's nakedness due to drunkeness and him cursing his youngest son due to him witnessing Noah's nakedness. Does this story wish to convey that even the most righteous of men shall sin in the end? I do not know, but that is what I received. Thus is the response to Genesis 9.

Genesis 10

It is Genesis 10, the chapter only describes the descendants of Noah, showing how they spread themselves among the earth, how mankind multiply and the nations came to be.

Genesis 11

It is Genesis 11, it mostly concerns with the scattering of languages and the genealogy of Abram which shall be Abraham. The Scripture itself does not make any comment on why God scattered the languages at Babel and let Babel fall into ruin. However, the interpretation that I have, that I believe the Holy Spirit gives to me is that this is an effort of sin. It is basically the first sin in a new form, the desire to be God and reach God, without God. Thus God does not approve of Babel and scattered the languages.

Genesis 12

It is Genesis 12, in this chapter the story of how Abram was first called by God is told. Abram went out of his homeland to a far place, and he made altars of offerings to God. Then there was the story of how Abram lied to the Egyptians about his wife, and then God sent some plagues to Egypt because of Abram's wife Sarai. It is interesting how Abram knew that the voice that spoke to him is God, or how any of the early humans knew that it is God. And the fact that Abram lies, though for a seemingly good intent, shows that even holy men still sin, due to many reasons.

Personal Reflection 18

 I want to be a saint. I know exactly that being a saint does not mean having grand spiritual experiences. It is instead to live simply in the Will of God. Yes we have heard of something extraordinary from the saints. Yet God has warned us against the superficial and the appearances. Holiness is like a plant, a good one must have strong roots and bear many fruits. The reason these saints have extraordinary stories is because they have mastery over the ordinary, such that they are given the extraordinary. God may use the stories to attract people to the path of holiness, in some unique divine marketing scheme, and lead them deeper into Him.

I have been aching to do His will, yet at the same time failing often. Even now I wonder if I am currently doing His will or am just doing what I think is His will. I do not know how much can my writing help people. I do not precisely know how to make exceptionally good pieces of writing. I write what I write, and that is the end of it. Does my writings have any meaning, does it and will it contribute to the Kingdom of God? The darkness that dominates my being does not make it easier to do this. I am a slave of the divine will.

Personal Reflection 17

 I shall explore the problem of existence even more in this writing, to further solidify the radical ontological argument of the existence of God. The reason most people will not accept this kind of argument is due to the understanding of what existence is. Existence is simply put the presence of an object inside reality, thus leading to the existence of an associated truth. Now what is truth? Truth is simply the fact that there is something. How do we know that there is truth? We know by our experiences of truth.

Now, existence in this viewpoint is much more independent of experience, it is eternal and it is of the essence, not of the actuality. As such all objects have 2 levels of existence, the essential existence and the actual existence. The essential existence relates to the basic eternity of the essence while the actual existence relates to the interaction or contact between that essence and the conscious being. So when we say that X exists, we must define first in what level of existence does X exist. We can eventually define a formula, "All things exist in their essence, but not all things exist in their actuality."

How do we know that all of this is true? The answer is we simply established this as truth, as a fundamental interpretation of experience. Thus the full understanding of this matter can only be achieved by understanding first knowledge that is experience. In this viewpoint, we desire to abstract everything to their highest and most general levels. At any point of time, we are first faced with the truth of experience, and then the truth of existence. Why must experience come first and not existence? It is because those are the basic facts of the matter which cannot be denied.

Now many philosophers would inspect their experience to gain some insight on the nature of reality. I do not do that, I simply inspect the fact of experience and not the content of experience. For I believe that the content of experience can be anything and it will not tell us anything useful about reality. For the contents of experience, that is our personal reality, is not a necessary reality but a contingent one, it is the way it is but no law of reality obliges it to be that way. For that reason I do not inspect the contents of experience.

There are 3 revelations of knowledge at the exact same time yet at different orders. In the beginning we have experience, and from that revelation proceeds 2 revelations at once, the revelation of existence and the revelation of truth. Of course, there are many more revelations than just those 2, but those are the ones fundamental to our understanding of reality. This can be demonstrated with the following sentences, "There is experience", "There is is", "There are 3 sentences."

Now, it is rather interesting that the 3 revelations comply with the Trinitarian generation and procession doctrine. First we have experience as the sole object, then of the experience we attribute existence by the mere fact of it, then we attribute truth to the collective facts of experience and existence. The revelation of experience is the Father, the revelation of existence is the Son, and the revelation of truth is the Holy Spirit. Of course the actual appropriations may differ, but it is a neat coincidence.

The concept or essence of experience is known to all but undefinable. One may only explain the examples, that is the members of the category that is experience. It is undefinable due to its primacy and fundamentality in the order of knowledge. It is also one of the primary categories of reality other than existence. The concept or essence of existence is also known but undefinable, it may be referred only as the *is* or *there* of an object. That the object *is* and *is there*, means that it exists.

However, due to the nature of our reality, we only ever have experience and the existence of that experience to meddle around in our understanding of reality. By the inference of the containment principle we can reach the understanding that existence is separate from experience. Experience is then a subtype of existence, but it is not equivalent to existence itself, though for every object there is a corresponding experience. This is the correspondence model of experience and existence, or as I once say, the causal model.

What is the inference of the containment principle? It is this, we understand that experiences come and go, they begin and end. Before they begin, they must have an origin where they are potential and their essence exist in potentiality. In that potential essential existence, they are not an experience but rather a separate being from experience. For the essence of an experience is to be experienced by a subject, in divorce from a subject, it no longer becomes an experience.

Finally we arrive at the essence of truth. What is truth? Truth can be seen in 2 ways, the subjective truth and the objective truth. The subjective truth is the correspondence between an idea or thought with the actual reality, in other words it is an idea about reality. The objective truth is truly identical with reality itself. I used to think that truth is an immaterial abstract record on any object, yet what is the essence of such immaterial abstract record? 

The view of truth as an immaterial record of things, or the enabler of knowledge and experience leads to the conclusion that each object is its own truth. Truth is simply identical with reality itself. For the enabler of knowledge is nothing else but the object itself. When we know an object fully, we experience the object fully and we possess that object fully as well. So if Truth and Reality are identical, then why do we distinguish between the 2, or speak of them as if they are different things? 

As truth refers to the capacity of reality to be received by the conscious being. While reality refers to the essence of reality itself independent of any conscious being. Since objective truth is indistinguishable from the object, the only concept of truth left that we have is the correspondence model, that is the containment of an object within a container called ideas or thoughts. Thoughts and ideas then again are not really containers, they are merely a special kind of experience distinct from actual experience.

With these elaborations, the revelations of experience, existence, and truth is complete. Now we shall move on to the grand problem, the attainment of knowledge of existence. The fact that essences have no beginning points to the possible reality that essences have no end as well, meaning that they are fundamentally eternal. However, can we determine that they indeed have no end and are truly eternal? We can refer back to the truth. When an essence leaves experience and ceasing to be united with experience in our perspective, the truth of its being does not change, the essence remains what it is unaltered by any of our actions.

For it is simple fact that an essence or any essence is unaltered by anything at all and is preserved in a single eternal point of time. The question is how is this fact of essence known? This I have difficulties with, it is simply an axiomatic interpretation of the facts of reality. Thus considering that essences are all eternal, then there is one essence, the essence of essences which are highest of all and most eternal, this essence we know to be God.

So God exists absolutely, in all meanings of what He is. The question is does He interact with us, or in what worlds is He manifest more? Is our world one of those worlds? Atheists should drop their idea of the non-existence of God and instead argue for the relative non-existence of God. That is relative to us, God exists or does not exist, but nobody can claim the absolute non-existence of God. For the mere thought of God points to the truth of God and to His essence, thus the essence of God must exist absolutely.

Personal Reflection 16

 The existence of God is a fact taken for granted by me, but this is only because God has not ordained me to fully investigate the problem of His existence. Now is the time for me to investigate that problem according to God's light on my reason. The existence of a principal power in this universe or reality is inferred from the general facts of reality itself. This investigation of general factuality has been found to be more satisfactory to my intellect than the more ancient arguments such as by Aquinas and the likes.

The general fact is that for our world to change, there has to be a regulator of that change, a ruler. That ruler is what we know as God. However, before we may know Him as God, we know Him as Truth, Law, and Will. God is Truth, for He is the Truth of Reality itself, God is Law, for He rules everything, and God is Will, for He moves everything as the first cause of all things. However, without intuited revelation, that is the limit of what we can know about God.

If we simply look at the finite world, there can be no reaching the conclusion of a simple infinity that is the God which we are more accustomed with. For there is no logical link between the finite world and the infinite reality of God. We can say that within Truth there is everything, but in what form? In actuality or simply in essence, thus making them potential only. Thus the truth that God is experience, is also unreachable by the natural mind.

For it is not outside of the realms of possibility that the reality of God ends with the Truth. That is a sovereign which does know everything but not in the phenomenal sense of the word "know". Such sovereign regulates goodness, but only out of nature, and not out of any actual goodness within that Truth. The Truth actualizes, that is it creates, but it seems to create everything, without any discrimination. Those worlds we see in fiction, are real in relationship to themselves. 

However, the fact that we may imagine anything means that the contents of our imagination must be real according to the Truth. For there is no law against the existence of anything which does not violate logical laws, if such laws are to be believed in the first place. Without any particular laws to stop anything from existing, then all things exist in the first place. This is what I would call a radical ontological argument, because it does not only treat of the existence of God, but also the existence of all other things.

The full argument goes like this. We have a thought of X. There is Truth of X. If there is Truth of X, X exists. Therefore, X exists. This thus can be applied to God, we have a thought of God, there is Truth of God, if there is Truth of God, God exists, therefore God exists. It has been revealed to me that this is the simplest and best argument for the existence of God and all other things. With this the problem of God's existence is resolved simply.

Personal Reflection 15

 Amidst the writings of the world, those which have been, those which are, those which will be, and those which will never be, there is a book, a single book. This book is the perfect book. However, we must understand by what aspect is this book perfect. The perfection of this book is that everyone who reads this book shall understand it, and that it contains the knowledge of everything in the precise order that people must understand it. After all, books are written in a particular linear sequential order, so the order of knowledge as written in the book must be significant as well.

There is a problem, due to the diversity of the understandings of man, then this book does not come in one form, but in multiple forms depending on each person. For each person, they shall have their own book. The essence, or knowledge of the book must be the same, but the accidents of the book may be different, including those of aesthetical qualities. It is perhaps already known at this point that this book is of God Himself, that this book contains the united knowledge of God Himself and thus this book is in a way, "God Himself in book form".

The essential difference between God and that heavenly book is that God is strictly speaking not a book. The book is in fact not even capable of actually giving us full knowledge of everything, because reading the description of being drunk alone does not inspire that state within ourselves. The book can only inspire within us an analogical understanding of everything, that is what we commonly understand as knowledge, and not direct knowledge.

The second problem is that we understand the teaching that God does not give to us what is unnecessary to our eternal happiness. It is then proven that it is not necessary to be God to have eternal happiness. Everyone shall not see God, that is to know Him, in the same way or degree. This fact means that there is an inequality in the beatific vision and the knowledge that each person will receive about God. They are all direct and probably share a single essence communicable between each person, but it is likely that some simply see more of that essence of the vision.

For that reason, it is highly unlikely that God will allow us to access such a perfect book. Instead of a book of everything, we would have a perfect book in so far God allows us to have a perfect book. Though considering that the book in its first form can never give us true knowledge of anything and only analogies and recollections, then perhaps the book is allowed by God, though there is still some possibility that God will not allow the full book and only a specialized book for each of us.

The reason I write about this heavenly book is because I want to read that book, and if by the grace of God I am allowed to, generate that book in this world. Of course, were I to write that book at all, it would seemingly be for my own satisfaction and not for the goodness of other people, though it would be a great good if it can contribute to the goodness of others. Why do I think this book would not be of much use to others? Because books are already bountiful in this current time, and everyone can write anything. The orders of the world have been established such that there is no more need to create a new order but simply to adjust it into the best order that we can have.

Personal Reflection 14

 Aku tahu bahwa dengan upayaku sendiri, aku tidak akan mampu mencapai Kebenaran, baik di hidup ini atau di hidup manapun juga. Namun dengan rahmat Allah aku percaya bahwa aku dapat melaksanakan apapun juga demi Allah. Masalahnya, apa yang aku pikir adalah baik dan demi Allah belum tentu sungguh baik dan demi Allah bagi diriku sendiri. Maka pencarianku akan Kebenaran belum tentu direstui Allah karena bisa jadi Dia memiliki rencana yang lebih baik dari Kebenaran itu.

Sesungguhnya aku telah menerima Kebenaran itu, setiap minggu aku menerima Dia dalam wujud suatu roti bundar pipih yang putih dan kecil, tidak lebih besar dari telapak tangan dan malah lebih kecil, itulah Ekaristi. Namun, begitu aku tidak menerima-Nya, aku kehausan, saat aku teringat oleh Dia, aku membutuhkan Dia dan menjadi sangat lapar dan haus akan Kebenaran. Ada 2 wujud penerimaan kebenaran, kebenaran yang sebagian-sebagian saja yaitu yang ada di dalam budi kita, dan Kebenaran yang penuh yaitu Ekaristi atau Tuhan kita Yesus Kristus sendiri.

Kehausan yang aku alami adalah kehausan akan integrasi kebenaran dengan budi dan jiwaku sendiri, atau kehausan akan kebenaran yang terpecah-pecah itu. Pada akhirnya kehausan semacam itu pun hanya dapat dipenuhi oleh Allah, Sang Kebenaran itu sendiri. Pada saat aku melihat Allah di akhirat, di situ lah pencarianku akhirnya berakhir. Sekarang aku pun telah melihat Allah, hanya saja tidak sempurna melainkan samar-samar seperti dalam cermin (1 Korintus 13:12), dan nanti aku akan melihat Dia muka ke muka.

Pemahaman ini baik untuk menghibur diri, tapi tidak cukup untuk menghancurkan kehausan yang aku alami. Maka aku harus menahan diri dan menikmati kesengsaraan ini sampai Allah sendiri memanggilku dan menjemputku ke alam keabadian. Lalu apakah alasan aku menulis, apakah alasan aku melakukan apapun juga? Alasannya adalah tidak lain dan tidak bukan semata-mata untuk mempersiapkan diriku untuk penglihatan Ilahi yang menakjubkan itu. 

Story 3

Part 1

We stand on top of a cliff, or a hill, I'm not sure. The Man stands next to me, He seems to be at bliss as usual.

"Are you afraid?"

"I don't know how to continue the story."

"Write up some different styles, that'll make it easier for you."

"You're right."

So the story continues.

Part 2

This outlines the plan of my story, that is the whole vision of the world that I saw. The world is distinct by God's intervention on the world. Why is there a difference? Because there has to be, in this perfect reality, all forms of perfection must be realized and manifested and they inevitably are manifested and realized, for all essentially subsists in God. In the first vision, I saw the beginning of the Trinity, the angels, and the demons. I also communicated with the pre-incarnate Christ of that world. Now I shall explain the general history of the world.

For billions of years the physical universe progressed according to its predefined laws by God, and life by the force of the Holy Spirit came to be evolving according to the guidance of God and natural selection. Then the first humanoids evolved and around 4000 years before the birth of Christ, the first humans with souls came to be in the garden of Eden, sinned, and was exiled from God until their deaths several hundred years later.

The understanding of sin is different from our understanding of sin. Sin here represents rebellion against God as Goodness. This state of rebellion is also rebellion against being, thus leading to destructive measures. The consequence of sin is death, not as a punishment, but as a natural consequence of the essence of sin, that is rebellion against being and existence itself. However, one cannot die fully in this world, for their souls are eternal. 

Once a being sins, they can no longer revoke their actions nor can they work their way out of their state of death. They exist in perpetual torment, until a savior comes to save all beings from sin. That savior is of course Christ. We recall that the consequence of sin is death, or in a sense, it has been designed particularly within this world that the neutralizer of sin is a life. Sin is a negative substance, something like antimatter, which has to be neutralized with life, or being, or God Himself, a positive substance, which consumes the sin and thus God remains. This is the meaning of the death of Jesus.

Jesus died as He confronts the sin of the universe and His Being temporarily suffers due to the sins. However, He then resurrects and ascends into heaven glorified once more, at that point sin no longer has dominion over mankind, and mankind has freedom to either continue live in sin or accept the freedom and salvation that God has provided for him. Now so far this does coincide with our own world, though the difference is that in this world, this is the precise reality of the matter.

The difference shall be pointed out. In this world, there is in the beginning 2 major faith systems, the Abrahamic, and the Karmic, which eventually merges to form the true Christian faith of that world. Both faith systems are monotheistic. Polytheism may have occured in this world, but God poured much more graces in this world than in our world, such that eventually, polytheism was eradicated and only true theism remains in this world.

Israel accepts their messiah despite their initial rejection, and was temporally saved by being transported supernaturally to the lands of Nusantara, thus forming Nesiya. The prophecies of Nesiya has been in the Old Testament and the New Testament. There are 2 main churches in the world, the Nesiyan Church and the Catholic Church. They go their own ways, but in the end are merged together nearing the Second Coming. Christ returns to the world on the year 2000, and begins a temporal rule of the earth for 1000 years. 1000 years serves as the ultimate conversion of the world. On the year 3000, the final groups of people and beings are converted, repented, and saved, and with that history ends.